Universal Conquest: Fangs of the Serpent
by Master Porky Minch
Summary: When Porky finds himself in a strange village after time traveling during his fight with Lucas, he decides to have some fun conquering this new place. My first ever Crossover. Rated M for later chapters.
1. The Beginning of an Empire

Universal Conquest

Fangs of the Serpent

The Beginning of an Empire

Author's Note: Ok, so I decided I really needed to get back into the EarthBound thing, and I've been really into the Shiki anime for some reason, so I decided to put both of them together.

Disclaimer: You know damn well!

BEGIN!

"I will never die... I will never die, nor will I ever be beaten!" the Pig King, Master Porky Minch exclaimed. From inside his Spider-Mech, he had confronted the resistance, which consisted of 2 psychic users, Kumatora and Lucas, a thief named Duster, and a dog named Boney. After fighting Ness and his friends, he was fairly confident that he had learned enough about psychics to beat the Chosen 4 this time. Sure, last time he had the omnipotent galactic conquerer Giygas backing him up at the last fight and they still lost, but his machines were much stronger now. It should also be stated that at that fight, there were three psychic users instead of two, so Porky had thought one less psychic would make the battle so much easier for him.

However, it had seemed that he had terribly overestimated the power he had over the 4, and was completely blind of their mastery of whatever skills they had until he confronted them face-to-face this one fight. Though Porky had decided that they were not as powerful as the other Chosen 4 he fought, and was glad he didn't have to deal with that pig's butt Ness again, he still couldn't muster the mechanics to defeat the opposition. "It's over Porky, you've lost." Lucas said with his voice tainted with hatred. Though he was usually a sort of pushover, he could never forgive the one who murdered his mother and turned his brother into a mechanical slave.

Porky could only laugh from the safety of his machine. "Lose? Me?! Hahahahaha! *cough cough, weeze* We've already been over this, no matter what you do, you could never kill me... though it would appear that my machine has run out of energy for the time being... hahahaha... Lucas, you haven't won, just so you know." He had already planned everything accordingly, and had a special capsule built just in case he was in one of these situations. He moved his hand with a toothy grin on his face to press the button, and bring the capsule to him. As he was looking to make sure he would press the right button, however, his smile suddenly faded and was replaced by a face filled with thought as something else caught his eye.

He didn't know why he decided to build another time machine in his Spider-Mech, especially since he was perfectly content with staying in this time, though he just really wanted to, so he had Dr. Andonuts install it without informing him of what it truly was. Had Dr. Andonuts known what Porky was having him build into that thing, he might not have done it, and this could be another _Not So Good Absolutely Safe Capsule _story, but he had installed it, and all Porky had to do was make sure all the programming was right. He thought it would be a great asset, though he meant to get rid of it, since he didn't even test it. "Hm... perhaps it's time to see what this thing can truly do." he muttered under his breath. With that, his grin came back as he began to punch in the coordinates.

The Chosen 4 thought nothing of it at first, but quickly realized something wasn't quite right about the whole thing when Porky began to laugh maliciously. "What the Hell are you doing?!" Kumatora shouted angrily as Porky continued to flip switches and press buttons.

Porky was glad that they asked, and decided to explain his new brilliant plan. "Well, my original plan was that if I lost, I could hide in safety and watch the destruction of this world take place... but then a thought hit me. If I'm setting up this huge kingdom just to watch everything get destroyed, then what's the point of me staying here?" Lucas was starting to get a hunch of what he was going to do. "Then, I just happened to notice I had a time machine built into this thing, so I decided, 'Why not go and see what other times and dimensions you can take over?'"

"Are you crazy?!" Duster exclimed as he was setting the perfect time for him to go. "I don't know much about science, but I do know that the whole space-time continuum is very fragile. Who knows what your actions could unleash?!"

Porky didn't really care about any of that, since he was going to destroy this timeline anyway. "Well, there's only one way to find out, isn't there my thieving enemy?" He had finished typing down what he needed, and decided to go to a place on the twenty-fifth of August, 1991. He thought if he was lucky, he could be sent to Onett, and maybe get rid of Ness before this whole thing started. "Well, I can't say that this whole thing hasn't been fun, but unfortunately, our little game has to come to an end. *cough, gasp, gasp, weeze* Maybe I'll see the 4 of you again sometime. But until then... adios, suckers."

"Porky, wait!" Lucas shouted, but it was too late. With a press of a button, the machine seemed to have come to life again, and began to fade away.

Just before it vanished completely, Porky stood up as best he could, and gave the Chosen 4 one last taunt. "Spankety, spankety, spankety!" And with that, the Spider-Mech and the Pig King vanished, leaving no traces behind...

XXX

As Porky began to wake up, he heard the chirping of birds and saw the bright blue sky. He took a few minutes to just lay there, and try to recollect everything that happened. He didn't know where that time traveling had sent him, nor did he even know if he was in the right timeline, but other than that, the whole thing was obviously a success. Perhaps it would be beneficial if he took some time to explore a bit.

As Porky tried to get up, he realized that moving wasn't at all as hard as it had been back in his new time. After he fully got up, he took a nearby shard of glass and used it as a mirror. He still had the same ripped and tattered blue overalls over a white t-shirt, but the rest of him looked completely transformed. He now looked like he was in his late 20s or early 30s. He still retained his obese girth, and his blonde hair still covered his eyes, but he was a bit taller, maybe about 6'0". His blonde hair was lustrous again, and he was clean-shaven. "Hm... so the time travel had an effect on my body's age again..." he said to himself.

He turned around and was completely horrified as to what he saw. His Spider-Mech was completely totalled. He had quickly decided that when he time traveled, he reappeared quite a distance in the air, and he must have passed out sometime before the crash landing. "Ah great! That was my favorite... well, at this point, that was my only robot." Porky whined as he walked over. He tried to tamper with it, and realized that the Spider-Mech was functional to a point, but between the case that protected him when he was inside being completely shattered and how it looked like it was ready to collapse on itself, he decided that it would probably be a better idea if he just repaired it if he got the chance.

"Well, I can salvage the mechanics of this thing I guess, and as long as the time machine is still going, I think I'll be fine." He took one minute to play around with the time machine, and sighed with relief when it began to make gear sounds, letting him know that it was still completely intact. "I guess I should probably have a look around. I just hope nobody will think too much of my Spider-Mech just laying around." he said as he found a road and began to walk on it. He kind of tripped and nearly fell a few times, since he wasn't really used to the refined strength of his limbs, but he decided he would just need to walk with them for a bit, and it shouldn't be a problem.

As he was walking, another thought came into his mind that scared him a bit. Now that he time traveled once again to a different time, and became this young man, did he still retain his immortality? He hadn't thought about that when he was there in that cave, and he was completely unfamiliar of the paths and landscapes of this new place, so he had no idea what could come along to harm him. "I guess all I can do is just keep going and hope..." he sighed to himself as he continued. It was a hot summer day, and he'd need to find some place to rest at some point, lest he suffer dehydration.

He had been walking for a bit, surprised that he hadn't been seeing any cars coming yet, and stopped when he came across a sign that gave the name of the town or city. He became very agitated when he saw that he couldn't read a single word of what the sign said. "Great, it's written in Japanese. I can't freaking read that." he said to himself. Nevertheless, he just thought that as long as nobody really knew where he came from, he could explore the place a bit, but he would have to be back to his Spider-Mech within a couple of hours if he wanted to garuntee it would still be there. He sighed, walked past the sign, and stayed with the road as he was going to check out the place.

Q: There are some charecters in the Shiki anime I actually like, such as Nao Yasumori, Sunako Kirishiki and Tohru Mutou, some I really don't care about much, like Chizuru Kirishiki and Tomio Ookawa, but so far, there's only one charecter in it that I really hate, and that is Masao Murasako. He's a little baby that always whines about everything, has to try to make everybody miserable, and can't seem to keep his mouth shut. I'm pretty sure everybody has to hate him since in the anime, he was slapped by his own father, made his own brother feel disgusted by him, and in the end was killed by his own sister-in-law. On that note, I'd like for you to tell me who's your least favorite (or most hated) charecter in the Shiki anime, and why.


	2. Crash Course for Conquest

Universal Conquest

Fangs of the Serpent

Crash Course for Conquest

It was a hot summer day in the small village of Sotaba. The day was August twenty-fifth, 1991. This day, a certain teenage boy with purple hair named Natsuno was getting a drive to school from his friend Torhu, who ws being watched over by Nurse Ritsuko, since he only had his permit yet. "The bus didn't come. Natsuno said from the back of the car. "I waited an hour, and then started walking to the next stop, and it passed me on the way there."

Tohru could only laugh a bit from the driver's seat. "Yeah, the same thing happened to me before."

"It's about 3 hours from Esibay if you're traveling on foot, isn't it?" Ritsuko asked from the passenger seat.

Natsuno leaned back against the back seat, sweating from the humid weather Sotaba commonly has on a summer day. "Yeah. If there were trains, it wouldn't matter. There's just the stupid bus."

Ritsuko only confirmed that she was aware of this. Torhu saw through his rearview mirror that Natsuno was hunched over with his eyes closed. "What's wrong? Not sleeping enough?"

"Pretty much." Natsuno said, when suddenly he had some kind of strange feeling. He simply tried to ignore it as he opened his eyes again. "Sometimes, all I can think about is how much I want to get out of here." Natsuno really didn't want to live here. His parents, who were unmarried, moved here thinking it would be a positive change for them, but all Natsuno really wanted to do was to graduate so he could move back to the city and get into college.

"You're parents moved here to be closer to nature, right?" Torhu asked, taking his eyes off the road to look at Natsuno. For whatever reason, Natsuno looked up at him. "Maybe you could humor them a bi-"

"Hey, watch out!" Natsuno suddenly yelled as he saw a figure in the middle of the road. Torhu looked back to the road to see a tall, blonde fat man with a ripped pair of overalls and a white t-shirt under them. The hair went over his eyes, so it was kind of hard to tell if he was trying to sleep while standing up or if he was just looking out to the other side. Panickly, Torhu slammed the brakes as hard as he could.

The shrieking sound that the tires gave got the man's attention as he looked over to see the car trying to stop. However, Torhu didn't hit the brakes fast enough, and the car hit the man fairly hard, knocking him down to the ground.

Immediately, when the car was fully stopped, Ritsuko and Torhu ran out of the car to check on the man. The man was just laying there, as if he was passed out, though through the little bit of his eyes that they could see, they saw his eyes were open, so hopefully he was still alive. "Oh my God, are you ok?" Torhu asked like he was about to have a heart attack. "I'm so sorry, I swear, I didn't mean to hit you with my-"

"Where am I?" the man asked as he laid there, almost as if he didn't even notice that he was nearly killed.

Ritsuko began to explain, thinking the man might have lost some of his short term memories. "You're in the middle of the road. You were just standing there when we came by and we didn't-"

"No, smart ass." the man said in an irritated matter as he began to get up and dust himseld off. He seemed surprisingly unfased considering the fact he took a pretty good hit. "I mean where am I? Onett? Twoson? Happy-Happy Village? Where?"

That gave Ritsuko the clue that he was referring to which village he was in. "Oh, uh... you're in Sotaba."

Sotaba's name gave a puzzled look to the man's face, as if he was trying to remember if he had heard that name before. "...Ok, thank you. Now, I gotta go to... someplace." he said as he began to limp away.

"Hold on, where do you think you're going?" Ritsuko said, making the man turn his head back and cease walking. "You can't just get into an accident like this and walk away from it like it was nothing. We should take you to the clinic to make sure you're alright."

Ritsuko made it obvious she was a nurse and that she wanted to help the man, but despite this, he rather coldly declined the offer. "No. I don't need to be taken to any freaking clinic. I assure you, I am fine."

"Well, I was the one who caused the accident, at least let me give you a ride to wherever you need to be to make up for it." Torhu said trying not to sound rude.

The man, however, was very stubborn, and once again became bitter to the ones who were trying to help him. "I don't need any help! I can walk over to my place just fine! I don't need a ride!" He walked to the other side of the road and began to walk.

He hadn't taken three steps when he suddenly heard a horn honking right behind him. The man turned around just in time to get a glimpse at a blue car and 2 young men in the driver's and passenger's seat before he was hit yet again. This time he didn't just get hurled to the ground, however. Instead, the car was able to slam into the man so that he was slammed onto the hood of the car and rolled off of it to the ground. "Oh dear God, did I hit him?!" shouted one of the men.

"I told you to put that freaking phone down!" the other man shouted before they drove out of sight.

Torhu, Ritsuko, and even Natsuno looked back to the man who was once again laying on the hard road. With one groan, the man lifted his head up, which was accompanied by a long and loud cracking sound coming from his vertebrate cracking, and quietly uttered rather slowly and painfully, "This... proves... nothing..."

XXX

Natsuno didn't exactly know what to think of the matter. The first thing he knew was he just saw a blonde fat man get ran over twice, one time was from his friend Torhu, and the next minute, he's riding in the back seat of his friend's car sitting right next to said man. It was almost as if he wasn't even human, being able to stand up and walk to the car after being ran over twice. There were several people that had their entire bodies broken when they were hit by a car, but this guy was able to walk away with just a small limp. This question somewhat puzzled him to a point, but he didn't bother to ask the man anything.

It was a couple of minutes later while Natsuno was resting his eyes for a few minutes that he heard the man beside him growl in irritation. He didn't know why, but something drew him to look over to see what had gotten the man to growl, and became quite intruiged when he saw him.

In his left hand he was holding something he had never seen in his life; a flat-bottomed radar shaped device big enough that only the man's fingertips were seen above it. It emitted some kind of green light at the top that reached up in the air that got dimmer as it went on. "Come on, why aren't any of them picking up?" the man muttered as he began to type something on the small keyboard on the front of the device.

Natsuno promised himself he wouldn't say a word to the man, but this thing seemed a bit interesting to him, and since Ritsuko and Torhu didn't seem to notice, he decided he would be the one to ask about it. "Um... what is that?" he asked, trying to make it sound as unammused as possible.

The man didn't even look away as he answered Natsuno's question. "A holographic comunicator, basically somewhat of a really advanced cell phone."\

Torhu heard this and decided to start to talk to the man while he continued to drive. "I've only seen one of those things in Star Wars. I never knew that they actually existed.

Natsuno couldn't help but notice the man tense up a bit, as if he was bringing up a subject he rather not talk about, but the man quickly relaxed again and responded in a rather boasting manner. "Well, I wouldn't really expect anyone around these parts to. After all, I'd consider this thing a 'town special' that only my home city knows how to make."

"Your home city? Do you live far away?" Ritsuko asked.

This question caused the man to give it a bit of thought, as if trying to think of what to say. "Well... I'm really not sure how far away. I live in a city known as New Pork City."

"New Pork City? I've never heard of a place like that." Natsuno said, rather perplexed.

"Again, it wouldn't really surprise me. See, my city is on an island somewhere... about 500 miles to the east of Tokyo. The island is called Nowhere Island... I can only assume they named it that because they really didn't want anybody to know it existed unless they live there."

They continued to drive the rest of the way in silence, until Ritsuko brought up another topic when they were 5 minutes away from the clinic. "Oh, I just realized we haven't introduced ourselves yet." The man looked up to the woman and began to listen. "My name is Ritsuko."

"And I'm Torhu." the other blonde man said from the driver's seat. "And the guy you're sitting next to; his name is Natsuno... though, he doesn't really like it when you call him by that name." he said kinda nervously as he saw Natsuno shoot him a look in the rear-view mirror.

"Ah, I see. You may call me Porky... and, thanks for the ride. If you could drop me off at the clinic, I think I can find my way from there."

"Whatever you say, but if you're ever around Sotaba again, come by and visit me." Torhu said in his usual cheerful, carefree voice.

After Ritsuko and Porky got out of the car and began to go their own seperate ways, Natsuno and Torhu began their drive to school. "What a really nice guy." Torhu said to himself.

"You think so? I thought he was weird..."

Q: Personally, I think that Shiki was the best anime ever, in both the Japanese and English dubs. The most powerful factor to any anime to me is the emotion that's put into it. I saw Nao's death scene online before I started watching the anime, but that one scene was packed with so much emotion that the very minute I watched it, I knew that it was going to be a great anime, and let me tell you, it didn't disappoint me to the slightest. On that note, I'd like you to tell me what your favorite anime is, and why (it can be just the original Japanese, it could be just the English dub, or it could be both, any of them qualify).


End file.
